Storms, Secrets and Misconceptions
by FelixFelicis-LiquidLuck
Summary: There are times when you feel a hell of a lot better after telling someone something you have kept to yourself for a long time. There are times when you have secrets that meant to be kept to yourself. And having a crush on said best friend and roommate? Yep, that's in the latter category.


Merlin was afraid of thunder, lightening and anything to do with storms.

Which was unfortunate, because Arthur was trying to sleep, thank you very much, and didn't need to be worrying about Merlin, who was sleeping in the bed near him. Merlin was usually the most convenient person to be roomed with, but when a storm was currently raging outside? Nope.

Maybe there was some traumatic experience behind it. Maybe Merlin was just strange, standing tall in situations were any normal person would have fainted in but whimpering the moment a flash of lightening illuminated the dark dorm room.

Either way, every time thunder clapped, Arthur would hear the bed creak loudly as Merlin jumped.

"Are you okay?" Arthur asked, concerned. Merlin was silent for a short moment before replying.

"Yeah, I'm fine, it just surprised me, that's all," he laughed shakily.

Lightening flashed and Merlin let out a strange sound that he would later insist was not squeak, muffled as though he was trying to quiet himself down with a pillow.

"Merlin?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I sleep with you?" Merlin asked in a small voice.

Arthur froze, surprised, as the image of the two of them, curled up on a single bed occupied his entire mind. His heart began beating so fast that he was surprised Merlin didn't hear it. Sure, they were two guys and Merlin probably didn't mean anything more than platonic comfort by it, but the real question was: Could Arthur handle lying next to Merlin without popping a boner?

Considering he had trouble containing with his, very physical and very visible appreciation of Merlin even when both of them were standing upright, he sincerely doubted it.

Still, he couldn't leave Merlin hanging. The poor guy was terrified and Arthur was obligated, as a friend, to reassure him and if that meant putting his own comfort aside for a single night, then so be it.

"Sure," he replied after a moment, albeit carefully. After all, this was his crush for god knows how long.

It was dark in the room, with the curtains firmly shut and the lights off. But the small streams of light from the moon outside showed Merlin, wearing pyjama pants and a large tshirt that made his frame look even smaller, stumble out of his own bed, clutching his pillow and making his way to Arthur's. And thank heavens for small mercies because Arthur would have had to take back his answer if Merlin was just wearing boxers.

And because Merlin was clumsy enough even when there was a proper light source, his foot caught on something in the dark and he stumbled. Arthur leaned forward immediately, catching his arm. Merlin gave him a sheepish smile.

"Thanks," he said. Arthur gave a non-committal shrug, pulling the duvet back and rolling over to make space for the other male.

Instead of lying in the space Arthur had made for him, he clambered over Arthur, squashing himself by the wall. Arthur chuckled and rolled over to the other side again, carefully avoiding hitting his head on the ladder.

"I have a habit of falling out of beds," Merlin admitted. Arthur snorted.

"Somehow, that doesn't surprised me as much as it should."

Merlin smiled again, gratefully. Arthur found his breath taken away for a moment at the sight, Merlin's dark hair splayed on his pillow, eyes crinkled and smile bright, inches away, close enough on the small bunk bed for Arthur to feel his body heat.

"Thanks, Arthur."

"No problem."

Thunder, again.

Merlin jumped and a little 'meep' slipped from his lips as his hand came out to clutch Arthur's arm tightly. His eyes widened dramatically and he looked terrified. Arthur, acting on impulse, placed his hand over Merlin's and rubbed circles on the back of his hand soothingly.

"Shh, it's okay, it's alright..."

Merlin whimpered. Arthur resisted the urge to wrap him up and keep him forever.

The thunder quietened down and Merlin's breathing evened out until he was completely asleep in less than five minutes.

His hand was still clutching Arthur's shirt. Everytime Arthur even shifted, the grip would tighten, and Merlin's face would unconsciously scrunch up his face.

But when Arthur was still, his face relaxed to create what Arthur decided, with very little exaggeration, the most beautiful sight he had ever seen. His hair tousled, his face relaxed and a small smile on his face.

"You're so cute when you're asleep," Arthur chuckled quietly. He figured it wouldn't hurt, since Merlin was clearly knocked out. "You look peaceful."

He watched Merlin for a little longer.

"I wonder what it would be like to kiss you," he mumbled quietly to himself. "I wish I could take you on dates, hold your hand in public, show you off to all my friends."

Merlin didn't move and Arthur let out a sigh, too many emotions swirling.

"I wish I could keep you forever."

He let his fingers trail across Merlin's cheek lightly, and he stared at him silently as though he was trying to memorise every detail of his face.

Merlin smiled suddenly, eyes still closed. "Really?"

Arthur froze, heart beating fast. Merlin's eyes opened and he grinned.

"Do you really?"

Arthur didn't answer but jumped out of the bed.

"Arthur! Wait!" Merlin yelled, tangled up in the duvet. He tried to get off the bed and followed Arthur, only for his foot to get trapped. He fell to the floor. Arthur quelled the instinct to help Merlin up and ran.

He didn't stop.

He didn't know where he was going, but all he knew was that he had to get away. Had to hide. He ran out of their room, footsteps light as he passed the other doors in the corridor. He skipped the lift, ran down several flights of stairs, ran out of the gates and into the streets. He ran and ran and didn't look back.

He was a coward, and he wasn't going to deny it.

The storm had stopped, though a light smattering of rain still fell. Arthur wrapped his arms around himself, wishing he had something heavier to protect his body from the cold.

He sat down on the bench, opposite the lake, staring out into the water. He fucked up. He fucked up bad. Years of friendship, devotion, loyalty, memories, everything he had shared with Merlin, shattered into tiny, bitter pieces all because he was too fucking stupid to realise that Merlin was awake.

The rain stopped after a while but the tears continued to flow down his cheeks.

He wasn't found until half an hour later.

"Merlin?"

Arthur winced. Of all people to find him, of course it was Merlin.

"Yeah?" he replied as casually as possible whilst wiping the wetness on his face vigorously. He wondered if Merlin had noticed - he hoped not.

Merlin sat down next to him, staring out the lake.

"Lucky the storm stopped," Merlin said. Arthur kind of felt like jumping into the lake and just drowning himself in embarrassment, but he bit his lip and stayed where he was. "Or you'd be soaking wet."

Arthur nodded, not trusting his voice. Another silence reigned.

"I didn't know you liked me."

Arthur looked away, biting his lip. Did they need this conversation? Couldn't Merlin just pretend nothing happened, and he hadn't heard anything?

"Hell, I didn't even know you were gay."

Arthur squashed the desire to run, run as far away from here.

"I wish you could've told me."

"Why?" Arthur said suddenly. Merlin looked at him, surprised and slightly confused.

"For you to reject me? So that our friendship can be ruined? So that everything we had between falling apart just because I'm so selfish that I want even more? Why the hell would you want me to tell you?"

Merlin looked even more surprised now.

"Because I like you back."

It was Arthur's turn to be surprised.

"Are... are you making fun of me?" Arthur asked hesitantly, unsure. Merlin shook his head.

"I thought you knew," he admitted, looking at the lake again. There wasn't much light out but the street lamp showed the faint flush dusting Merlin's cheeks. "I thought you knew and was pretending you didn't know to be, you know, tactful. I thought you ignoring it was your way of rejecting me."

"Rejecting-?" Arthur began disbelievingly before falling silent again, licking his dry lips. Merlin had thought Arthur had rejected him?

He felt slightly dizzy.

"Did you mean it?" Merlin asked quietly, turning to look at him again. He looked small and vulnerable, hesitant, as though he thought Arthur might take back everything he had said with a 'ha! tricked ya!'.

Arthur took a deep breath. "Every word."

Merlin was leaning in, closer than before. His hand rested tentatively on Arthur's thigh. His heart beating faster than he even believed possible, Arthur leaned forward until he could feel Merlin's breath mingling with his own.

There were no fireworks when they kissed. There were no butterflies or angels playing beautiful music in the background or flowers blooming in Arthur's vision. What there was, however, was a warm feeling in his stomach, like this was right, like this was what they were, this was them.

Arthur couldn't help but marvel at how soft Merlin's lips were. Slightly chapped, but yielding and even softer than he had dared imagine. Feeling brave, Arthur deepened the kiss, placing a hand on Merlin's upper-arm to pull him closer until their bodies were pressed together. Merlin let out a small moan.

"Um, guys?" a voice behind them announced. They parted and turned around. A soaked Lancelot and Gwen stood behind them, one of them looking as though they'd rather be anywhere but there and the other looking insufferably smug.

"You both have lectures early in the morning," Gwen reminded them, smirking. Lancelot looked determinedly at the ground and kicked a rock. Arthur nodded.

"Give us five minutes," he said, before going back to kissing Merlin, who suddenly had the demeanour of someone trying desperately not to laugh.

Lancelot coughed loudly.

"Uh, guys, seriously."

Merlin pushed Arthur away lightly, laughing.

"Let's go," Merlin grinned.

"Can you pick a more practical time to snog? You know, like, in the day? Rather than the middle of the night?" Lancelot grumbled, walking behind them. Gwen punched his arm.

"Shut up, they're cute," she argued. "I've been waiting for this day to happen for years."

Arthur turned to give her a disbelieving look. "That long?"

Gwen shrugged, a wicked glint in her eye. "I've seen both of you eyeing each other's asses for god-knows-how-long."

Lancelot groaned.


End file.
